Will Smith and Ted Cruz share two things in common? One is both their wives were publically humiliated, and two although their reactions to the humiliation were opposite, the commonality is that both reactions were the opposite EXTREMES!!!
During the campaign for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination, Donald Trump attacked the looks of Ted Cruz’s wife, Heidi Cruz, and accused his father, Rafael Bienvenido Cruz, of being involved with the assassination of former President John Kennedy. Ted Cruz’s response was to say “Donald, real men don’t attack women. Your wife is lovely, and Heidi is the love of my life”, and then proceeded for the next 7 years to endorse Trump for President, suck up to him and defend Trump’s continuing insulting behavior towards others, and bring his wife Heidi to a private dinner with Trump and his wife, without ever receiving or demanding an apology from Trump for insulting his wife and father.
As actor George Clooney remarked “I mean, Ted Cruz, think about what a yutz this guy is! I don’t care what your political view is, If a guy said that my wife was ugly and my father killed Kennedy, there is no way in the world you could have me come out and say, ‘I’ll defend you”
As the world witnessed during a live performance of this year’s Oscar Academy Awards, comedian Chris Rock told a joke about the appearance of Jada Pinkett Smith, wife of actor Will Smith, the reaction of Will Smith was immediate, and the total opposite of Ted Cruz’s reaction. Will Smith rose from his audience seat walked on stage and inflicted a facial assault slap on Chris Rock heard and witnessed around the world.
The reaction of Ted Cruz to Donald Trump’s insult to his wife and father came from an extreme place of weakness, and apparent lack of respect for the dignity of his wife and father. The reaction of Will Smith to Chris Rock’s insult to his wife came from an extreme place of strength, and an overabundance of male chivalry to defend the dignity of his wife. As American novelist Edna Ferber said, “Perhaps too much of everything is as bad as too little”. Ted Cruz needs some of the strength and male chivalry of Will Smith to man up for his cowardice, apparent lack of respect for his wife and father, and complete weakness. Will Smith needs some of the weakness of Ted Cruz to tamp down his overabundance of strength and male chivalry which transformed on Oscar night into thuggery.
Understandably, the true intent of the Will Smith slap was to inflict the joke pain felt by him and Jada Pinkett Smith, back onto Chris Rock. With that goal in mind, Will Smith should have taken a page from the strategy playbook of Martin Luther King Jr. Emphasis on strategy because although Dr. King lived a life dedicated to the philosophy of nonviolence in both word and deed, there was also a strategic reason he led the Civil Rights Movement to choose nonviolence as the weapon of choice to defeat legalized racial oppression and discrimination.
Dr. King understood that the only way to motivate American Whites to do the right thing, by eliminating legal racial discrimination was to capture their hearts and mind. Had violence of any kind been allowed to permeate the Civil Rights Movement it would have captured American White fear and resistance to racial legal and social change in America.
Imagine after Chris Rock told his joke Will Smith rose from his seat and walked onstage approaching Chris Rock face to face eye to eye mouthing the words, keep my wife’s name and hair out your f**king mouth, and returned to his seat minus the slap. Then when he returned onstage to accept his richly deserved Oscar, he first thanked the Academy and all who helped achieve his semi-historic moment and concluded his remarks by saying the following: I ask everyone who loves and supports me, everyone who is offended by the public pain and humiliation my wife has just experienced, would boycott anyone or anything associated with Chris Rock until he publically apologizes to Jada.
That night and following days would have been full of social media hearts and minds captured and focused on Jada’s humiliation, Chris Rock’s insensitivity to the plight of women who suffer from Alopecia, and the bold display of protection, love, and support Will Smith showed for his suffering wife. Instead of Chris Rock currently experiencing the huge bump in ticket sales for his national tour, he might be experiencing a huge dent in new ticket sales and a lot of people seeking refunds for tickets already purchased.
Will Smith has achieved American Black male star status in Hollywood second only to Sidney Poitier and Denzel Washington in that order bar none!!! But as Denzel Washington counseled him that night after the slap felt around the world “At your highest moment, be careful, that’s when the devil comes for you”, let’s all hope and pray that as Will Smith continues to reach future high moments, as his great talents have pre-destined him to do so, that he will indeed be much more thoughtful and careful.
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